Rickie Lambert - You know it makes sense

At first I was shocked. Everyone was weren't they? Rickie Lambert. Who saw that coming?

After the initial surprise had subsided though, I found myself struggling to think of a transfer in recent times that has made more sense than Liverpool acquiring the Saints’ Scouser.

Don’t get me wrong, I'm not saying it’s the best signing the club have made lately, just that it’s an entirely logical move. I'm not anticipating Lambert banging in 30 goals next season and displacing Daniel Sturridge or Luis Suarez in the first eleven, but I genuinely believe that this is an astute bit of business from the club.

Given my positive thoughts on the move, it will come as no shock to you that I have been severely taken aback by the amount of naysayers moaning about this transfer across social media and internet forums. From a purely footballing point of view, signing Southampton’s number 7 strikes me as somewhat of a no-brainer. I'm dumbfounded by the negativity that it has inspired from some quarters.

Last season Liverpool’s third choice striker was Iago Aspas. He tries his best, bless him, but let’s be honest, summoning the present day Robbie Fowler from the bench against Chelsea would have brought more belief to the Anfield crowd back in April. Aspas isn't good enough. Liverpool’s current depth up front isn't good enough either. Not for a campaign that will be spread across four competitions. Daniel Sturridge misses too many games already and Luis Suarez, like it or not, was slowing down at the end of last season even without Champions League games being added to the equation.

That being said, I hadn't even contemplated the Reds signing another striker during this window. I had assumed that Fabio Borini would fill the void that Aspas' likely departure will presumably leave in the coming weeks. Finding another centre forward from outside the club looked like tricky business to me. Anyone coming in would have had to not only be better than the back up options already in the squad but also be happy to sit on the bench quite a lot. You don’t usually find too many of those lads around.

By all accounts, Brendan Rodgers wasn't thinking about recruiting another striker much either. The club hadn't been linked to many out and out centre forwards prior to Lambert this summer and reports suggest that his name only cropped up during the recent negotiations with Southampton for Adam Lallana. As a result, when news broke about Lambert’s move back to Liverpool it was an undoubted surprise.

But what a delightful surprise it is when you really think about it.

For the paltry figure of £4m (or two thirds of an Iago Aspas if you prefer), Liverpool will now go into next season with a player who has scored 28 Premier League goals in the last 2 campaigns in their ranks. He contributed 23 goals and assists combined in the league last term for Southampton. He is an England international and no doubt his wages won’t be stretching the club’s bank balance too much either. Compared to what Brendan Rodgers currently has at his disposal, Lambert’s signing will represent an enormous improvement and all at a low cost with little risk involved to boot.

So where will he fit in?

Despite his appearance, Lambert isn't some one dimensional, hulking target man. Every time I've seen him in the Premier League over the past couple of seasons he’s struck me as a far more sophisticated player than that. He has a lovely touch, scores some belting goals with his feet and also chips in with his fair share of clever assists. In other words, he is no last resort to throw on and hump long balls up to like an Andy Carroll. He may well be the man Liverpool turn to if a game is deadlocked late on against a stubborn defensive outfit, but those anticipating Brendan Rodgers imploring his team to ‘go long to the big man’ when Lambert takes to the field will likely be left disappointed.

The Kirkby native represents another option with a different skill set to the forwards currently at the club but, while he will undoubtedly give the side more presence and threat in the penalty area, I would be amazed if he’s used simply as some unrefined battering ram as some are predicting.

Rickie Lambert may not the ‘marquee’ name that some fans wanted to kick off this summer’s transfer activity, but I'm really struggling to see a downside to this move. Yes, he’s 32 years old and he will never be world class but, when you look at the other top clubs in the Premier League, he appears to be a much safer bet than most of our rivals’ back up strikers (excluding the anomaly that is Manchester City, of course).

Would you back any of Yaya Sanogo, Arouna Kone, Harry Kane, Fernando Torres or Danny Welbeck to outscore Lambert over a season? Would you back Iago Aspas to? I know I wouldn't.

And for that reason alone, I'm more than happy with this move.

Welcome back Rickie.

The forgotten moments of 2013/14

Are you missing them yet? I know I am.

Life isn't quite the same without a Liverpool game to look forward to at the weekend. The imminent World Cup can’t come and go quickly enough as far as I'm concerned. Forget Hodgson and the three lions, I long to cast my eyes upon that wonderful, mesmeric team in red again.

I'm sure you've been feeling similar things yourself. If you’re anything like me, you've probably devoured countless highlight packages and revisited some of the more glorious games from Liverpool's season.

And so, generous as I am, I thought I’d offer something a little different to break the - admittedly enjoyable - repetition of rewatching Liverpool v Man City, Suarez's four goal haul against Norwich, Liverpool v Arsenal, the Everton games and the rest of those celebrated high points of 2013/14.

As an alternative, I've compiled below, a collection of eight moments from campaign just gone that have slipped under the radar a little. Some are more significant than others while some will undoubtedly already be indelibly burned into your mind’s eye. Hopefully though, a few will have escaped your attention somewhat in amongst the stress of that title race and it’s deflating conclusion. I hope, therefore, that what follows below will bring a smile to your face as you relive these less heralded memories of the magical ride that was 2013/14.

Enjoy.

The greatest goal Anfield never saw

In amongst the madness that was Liverpool 5-1 Arsenal back in early February, Luis Suarez produced one of the most ridiculous long range strikes that you could wish to see.

With the Reds already two goals up inside ten minutes, Steven Gerrard took a less than perfect corner kick from the right hand side down at the Anfield Road end of the ground. The ball was struck low and arrowed vaguely towards Suarez who attempted to control the cross just outside the penalty area. His touch resulted in the ball bouncing further away from goal and up into the air. Struggling for balance and running back towards the Kop, the Uruguayan somehow managed to wrap his foot around the ball and unleash a volleyed effort from nearly 30 yards out. The velocity and swerve of the ball as it left his right boot was scarcely believable. To use a technical footballing term, the shot was a bona fide thunder-bastard. Wojciech Szczesny in the Arsenal goal offered a token dive but didn't even have time to extend his arms as the ball blazed past him in an instant.

The fact that the post was left shuddering and the goal netting remained undisturbed is one of the season’s great disappointments. Had the ball moved just another inch or two in the air, Anfield would have been celebrating one of the most incredible goals in it’s history. Forget goal of the year, this would have been goal of the decade. Instead, the entire crowd was left open mouthed and with hands on heads which, ironically, is exactly the same reaction that Kolo Toure gave immediately after he missed the rebound effort with the goal at his mercy.

Classy Coutinho leaves them on their Arse

Staying with that incredible day when the Reds eviscerated the then league leaders, it would be remiss of me not to include one of the numerous pieces of skill that Philippe Coutinho treated us to during his midfield master class. Having already produced a terrific slide rule assist for Daniel Sturridge in the first half, the little Brazilian outdid himself in the second period with a move of such grace and quality that it left onlookers slack jawed and Arsenal players hopelessly chasing his shadow.

Collecting a loose ball on the edge of his own penalty area, Liverpool’s number ten danced smoothly between Mesut Ozil and Lukas Podolski before dragging the ball effortlessly beyond Jack Wilshere with a shake of his hips. He then accelerated past half way before delivering a perfectly weighted, curling forty yard pass between Mikel Arteta and Kieran Gibbs to put his team mate Jordan Henderson clean through on goal. The England midfielder appropriately attempted to punctuate the move with a jaunty chip from the edge of the penalty area - blasting it home would have been no way to cap such a graceful assist would it? - but sadly the ball floated wide of the post.

It may not have led to a goal, but the spin, the skill and the execution of the pass that Coutinho showcased was pure footballing fantasy and one of the most aesthetically pleasing pieces of play that a Liverpool player contributed during the season.

Back heels from you Jordan Henderson...

Everyone knows how far Jordan Henderson has come in the last 18 months of his career. I could have picked dozens of examples from 2013/14 that illustrated his development but, in the end, I settled for three.

For a long while, Henderson was a player devoid of confidence at Anfield. Under Kenny Dalglish, he’d choose a safe pass whenever he could, he would rarely get himself in to goal scoring positions and he certainly wasn't attempting any fancy flicks and tricks back then. He is now.

Henderson helped set up three goals with back-heels this term. If that doesn't display confidence and technique then I don’t know what does. The first came at White Hart Lane on December 15th 2013. Breaking into the box and running towards the byline, the England midfielder pulled off an impudent back-heel that nutmegged Kyle Walker and allowed Luis Suarez to cross for Jon Flanagan who battered the ball past Hugo Lloris. Less than a week later, Henderson was at it again. This time his perfectly weighted flick rolled back to Luis Suarez following a quick one-two and the striker curled home a sumptuous goal to put Liverpool 2-0 up against Cardiff. Henderson’s back-heel hat-trick was completed when Liverpool found themselves 2-0 down at home to Aston Villa back in January. A first time flick through his own legs inside the penalty area released Daniel Sturridge who got Liverpool back into the game.

These three incidents demonstrate just how much the 23 year old has improved and also offer a glimpse of how much better he can yet become. So here's to you Jordan Henderson...

Sturridge does his best Jordan impression

There was a plethora of goals scored by Liverpool this season (I'm refusing to call it ‘last season’ just yet. I don’t want to let it go that quickly!) that didn't get the recognition they deserved. Daniel Sturridge’s chip against West Brom and Luis Suarez’s 18 yard header in the same game, to name just two. But the one that I feel is still most criminally underrated came courtesy of an outrageous Sturridge back-heel against Cardiff City.

With the Reds leading a topsy turvy game 3-2 on the hour mark, Glen Johnson got down the right hand side and produced a pretty poor cross - I know, who saw that coming? -  that hit a Cardiff defender and ricocheted free in the box. With the ball rolling close to the byline and to the right of the goal, Daniel Sturridge decided that the easiest thing to do would be to blindly smash a first time back-heeled pass directly into the stride of Luis Suarez who, presumably, would be anticipating such ludicrous thinking and position himself on the edge of the six yard box. Suarez, of course, was exactly where Sturridge needed him to be and put Liverpool 4-2 up in the game with a left footed finish past David Marshall.

That this goal came in a match that yielded 9 goals was fitting. It was perfect in execution and the imagination that went into it summed up just how enthralling Liverpool now are to watch. Jordan Henderson - who, as we've established, loves a back-heel himself - could scarcely believe what Sturridge had done. His reaction to the goal was nearly as glorious as the skill itself. Henderson couldn't contain himself as he skipped up and down on the spot with bewildered excitement. Brilliant.

Flanno floors Soldado…

Liverpool v Tottenham at Anfield was a bit of a non-event in truth. The Reds waltzed their way to victory in comfortable fashion having sewn up the game in the first 45 minutes. Spurs’ now departed manager Tim Sherwood admitted that he stayed in the director’s box for the entire match because he ‘couldn't do anything to help’ his players by relocating to pitch side. Such was the difference in quality between the two teams. You could then, have forgiven Liverpool’s players for easing off and playing the second half of this one sided ‘contest’ in second gear.

Jon Flanagan had other ideas. With his side in a commanding position and all three points firmly wedged in their back pockets, Liverpool finally faced a rare moment of danger in the 81st minute. Spurs' £24m striker, Roberto Soldado, received a pass twenty yards from Liverpool’s goal and began to stride into the penalty area. He didn't get very far. Quick as a flash, Liverpool’s Scouse fullback launched himself into a slide tackle that wouldn't have looked out of place in a Tommy Smith montage. After taking the ball, Flanagan's follow through saw him career into Soldado and deposit the Spain international on his backside, albeit after a somersault. A perfectly timed, ball winning tackle that left an esteemed international writhing in pain. It doesn't get much better than that for a young defender. Welcome to Anfield, Roberto.

...and gives Lennon the slip

If that Soldado challenge summed up Jon Flanagan’s whole hearted approach to football, this moment showcased the lesser heralded side of his game. The general view of ‘Flanno’ prior to this season was one of a gritty, determined defender who lacks a bit of finesse and serenity on the ball. To his credit, the youngster is beginning to alter such perceptions. This move against Spurs did a lot to further his cause in that respect.

Collecting a pass on the left wing, in the defensive third of the pitch and under pressure from Aaron Lennon, Flanagan initially feigned to take the ball inside onto his preferred right foot. Lennon bought the dummy and was left red faced as Liverpool’s left back pulled off a delightful little Cruyff turn and sped away up the line leaving the England winger trailing in his wake. The move was greeted with a huge cheer from the Anfield crowd and the noise continued as Philippe Coutinho smashed home from 20 yards to finish Flanagan's work off. It may not have been the greatest piece of individual skill that Anfield witnessed during 2013/14, but this assist was a sweet moment for Liverpool’s latest Academy starlet.

Coutinho teases the tigers

Liverpool 2-0 Hull City. One of the few games from this season that didn't really capture the imagination. It is best remembered for a trademark Luis Suarez free kick at the Kop end but, in truth, for little else. It could have been very different, though. This game could and should have yielded one of the best solo goals in years.

In the second minute of stoppage time with the game winding down to it’s natural conclusion, Philippe Coutinho picked up possession five yards inside his own half. Six seconds later he was bearing down on goal having danced past three opponents. Ultimately, he struck his shot straight at Hull keeper Allan McGregor who made the save, but the run that preceded the shot was dazzling. Two Hull defenders were left eating the turf as the Brazilian magician showed once more just why he is such an exciting prospect.  

Sturridge juggles his way to goal

You know a goal is somewhat out of the ordinary when your girlfriend (who isn't much of a football fan) starts laughing her head off at it. After yelling with relief at the fact that Liverpool had finally sealed three valuable points in a needlessly stressful encounter with Stoke City, I enquired as to why my better half’s sides were splitting. ‘That goal was just weird. He was like a performing seal, I've never seen anything like that before’ came the riposte. Touché.

Stoke City 3-5 Liverpool felt monumental. Steven Gerrard in a new role, the Reds’ first win at the Britannia in a league game, an ever changing scoreline that that swung more times than the Foucault pendulum and the return of Daniel Sturridge. It was the striker’s goal in this match that so amused my partner and delighted Liverpool fans. After his initial shot was saved at the near post, Sturridge kept the ball in play with his chest, steadied himself by heading it up into the air and finally rifled home on the volley underneath Asmir Begovic. It was certainly a unique way of finding the net and the improvisation and technique were second to none. It also finally killed off a Stoke side who had looked likely to snatch a point until that moment.

So there you have it. A collection of nearly moments, sumptuous skills and glittering goals that were somewhat lost under the avalanche of highlights from Liverpool’s season. Roll on 2014/15.

He Slipped on his Fucking Arse......

Steve Gerrard, Gerrard

He slipped on his fucking arse

He gave it to Demba Ba

Steve Gerrard, Gerrard.

And with that nifty little ditty, any conflicting feelings I had about England at this summer’s World Cup all but vanished.

The last time that I actively wanted the English national team to do well in an international tournament was at Euro 96. Back then I was child who had yet to develop any of the apathetic or negative feelings that have since grown inside me for all things ‘Three Lions’. I admit that that summer of international football in our own country was intoxicating for the ten year old me.

That being said, I still wanted Italy to win that tournament and went to Anfield to see them against Russia. My Father (An Italian) introduced me to football and therefore Italy have always been my international side of choice. Lucky me.

As a kid, England I could take or leave, usually. As an adult though, I've basically gone about ignoring them until that becomes impossible (every other summer unless Steve McClaren is their manager). The little plastic St George’s flags appear on cars, the pubs fill up with idiots who can’t handle their ale and millions of people form an opinion on a sport that they hardly follow. Mercifully this all usually ends with England being sent packing on penalties. Frankly, the whole experience does my head in and I only really begin to enjoy international tournaments when England exit.

Before last weekend though, I was genuinely worried that this World Cup would buck the trend. Liverpool have five players (potentially six if Adam Lallana signs on in the next few weeks) representing England in Brazil. They should all be in the starting line up, too. I've always wanted to see our lads do well individually for their national teams and, given that such a large red contingent will be taking to the field for England in Brazil, I was beginning to dread the prospect of having to cheer on a side led by Roy Hodgson and backed up by that S*n sponsored brass band and all the ‘ten German bombers’ whoppers. Panic was truly setting in.

The England Brass Band. Not for me.

So a massive ‘thank you’ is in order to the fans of Newcastle United, our 7th placed ‘rivals’ from down the East Lancs and our neighbours, Everton. When they all relentlessly ripped into Steven Gerrard last week with the type of gusto and relish you would expect had their clubs had actually won a trophy, the panic subsided. Supporters up and down the country revelling in the slip that ‘cost Liverpool the league’ had made my mind up. Get behind England this summer? Not a chance.

I must stress that this isn't a choice made solely out of anger for one song and a stream of piss taking Vine videos, though. When Manchester City fans were banging the aforementioned tune out at Goodison Park a couple of weeks back, I didn't really have a problem with it. Taking the mickey is part of football and, as they were the beneficiaries of Gerrard’s slip, I could understand them rubbing our noses in it a bit. Part of the game, and all that.

Newcastle fans doing the same though? I wasn't having that. Those lads will be cheering ‘Wor Stevie’ on all summer long and yet last weekend they spent most of the game at Anfield mocking their international captain by chanting the name of a striker who basically pissed on their legs and ran off to London for more money. ‘Demba, Demba Ba’ indeed. ‘Irony’ mustn't translate into Geordie. Neither must the words ‘small time’.

Throw in Everton fans doing the Poznan at Hull and United fans flying a nonsensical and frankly, bewildering banner over Anfield as they limped to a humiliating 7th placed finish and I was back where I started:

Hoping that Steven Gerrard ‘slips on his fucking arse’ once more in Brazil and Luis Suarez sends England home as a result.

Demba Ba scores after Gerrard's infamous slip

If all the over the top Gerrard/Liverpool mocking wasn't enough to steer me back to sense, then Roy Hodgson’s 17 hour press conference this week - Sponsored by Vauxhall ‘Is your team a sports car or a family saloon Roy?’ Barf. - sealed the deal. I just can’t get behind England, it’s not possible.

If they were a club side they would be the type that has cheerleaders, plays the Fratellis when a goal is scored and their fans would sing songs exclusively to the tune of Sloop John B. The whole ‘In-ger-lund’ experience has always left me cold. It just feels small time and nothing epitomises small time more than spending the last day of your season singing about a player whose mistake had no effect on your club’s own (mis)fortunes. Yet that is what thousands of football fans around the country we’re reduced to on Sunday.

No doubt most of those lads who exhibited their hilarious ‘Gerrard Bantz’ will be getting behind ‘Roy’s Boys’ in a month’s time. Me? Thankfully I’ll be supporting the Azzurri and Luis Suarez.

Fuck England. Forza Italia.

Only Liverpool

Only Liverpool could blow it like that.

If you want to pick the bones out of it, by all means feel free to do so. Me? I haven’t got the heart to watch that game ever again, let alone to try and make sense of it. Things went tits up. Anything said on top of that is irrelevant nitpicking to my mind. Agger instead of Moses? Shut the game down at 3-1? Go five at the back? Yeah, sound, whatever. We lived by the sword, and last night we all but died by it.

But I defy anyone to tell me that when Luis Suarez got that third goal you weren't believing.

There was no celebrating when that masterful Uruguayan netted. Sod three nil. It was all about getting that ball back in play and winning by five or six. Only this Liverpool side would have believed they could still win the title on goal difference and have had the brass balls to go for it like that. Brendan might have called it ‘Roy of the Rovers football’ and lamented the fact that his boys weren't more measured, but I say ‘fuck that’. ‘Roy of the Rovers football’ has got us this far. Despite all of our flaws (and we have plenty of them), it’s got us 81 points, 99 goals and to the summit of the table after 37 games.

At three nil up that team had me expecting the impossible. Not even Melchester Rovers wouldn't have had the moxie to attempt what the Reds did last night. I was anticipating a fourth, a fifth, a sixth. I didn't want a three nil win. No other team in the country would have been racing back to half way when they held such a lead over a team as awkward and resilient as Crystal Palace. No other top side would have left themselves wide open and thrown two points away, either.

Only Liverpool.

The defensive capitulation was horrendous. At 3-2 the equaliser was inevitable. It was painful to watch and the only solace I can take is that I can now turn to my father (an Italian who supports a certain team we played in Istanbul once) and say ‘I understand a bit better. That must have killed you’.

Luis Suarez cries at the final whistle against Crystal Palace

The lack of resilience, the absence of a leader at the back, the inability to stem the tide, they’re all discussions for the summer. This team have lots to improve upon and improve they will, but right now I'm not ready to think about any of that. This season still hasn't finished and with one game remaining, Liverpool Football Club will take to the field on Sunday knowing that they could still be crowned champions of England. Forget Newcastle. The Geordies are going to be eviscerated at Anfield this weekend. It’s all about Villa and big Andy now. We’re at their mercy.

Is there likely to be a happy ending to all of this? In short, no. Last night’s nine minute implosion made that already slim possibility slimmer still, but how exhilarating were those second half minutes when we genuinely dared to do the impossible? They went down swinging. You can’t ask for more. Shut up shop with a 3-0 lead? When thousands of lads in the stands are screaming ‘ATTACK, ATTACK, ATTACK’ and believing in the impossible? Believing in those lads? Nah, not likely. Those boys might well have fallen at the last, but my goodness they took us on one hell of a ride.

This isn't intended to be some mad, overly optimistic call to arms. People have the right to be pissed off and devastated. They don’t have to tweet the word ‘BELIEVE’ or applaud the lads for a great season, because last night was the most bitter of pills to swallow and will need time to be digested. We all get over these things in different ways and over varying periods of time. Some will be looking on the bright side already while others will be far too deflated to even contemplate cracking a smile or raising a glass for what looks destined to be glorious failure. That’s fine. Cry away, lads. Everyone has earned the right to shed a tear or two this season.

So here we are. One game left and this is City’s title to throw away. Everyone is preparing for their coronation, and rightly so. They are an excellent side and Manuel Pellegrini has eight fingers on the Premier League trophy. Four points from six and they will have done it.

What other team could possibly raise themselves to snatch this title from City should they make a mistake?

Only Liverpool.